Out i come

So what a weekend. I’m still in shock now and disbelief, it sort of doesn’t feel real.

So this is how it went.

Friday I went to work and threw-up (vomited) 3 or 4 times cause I was just a bag of nerves. Strait after work (in London) I headed the station to go back to Bristol (where my parents lived). When I got to buying a ticket my hands where shacking so much I couldn’t press the buttons on the machine. I sat on the train and just listened to my iPod praying and trying to clear my head. By the time I got to Bristol I was on another planet of panic.

Once got home at 7pm I found out that my mum had gone climbing (my parents weren’t expecting me home) so I had to sit with my dad watching TV trying to look normal. Luckily my brother had gone to his friends for the night to watch films. About 9pm my mum finally got back. We sat there in the living room watch some crappy TV program and in my head I was freaking out. I was saying in my head “I cant do this, I cant do this, what if they reject me”.

I suddenly just blurted out “we need to have a serious chat”, all at once I thought I was g’na pass out, so I gave them the letter and said “you need to read this”. I started to cry I couldn’t take the pressure anymore, it had all built up way to much. As mum read it she just came over hugged me, as did Dad when he had finally read it.
“There is nothing in the world that you could do to stop us loving you”. (by this point I was balling my eyes out).

And so we sat there for about 2 and a half hours just speaking about everything; about the last year, about Mr C, about my faith.

The next morning I went into my parent’s room and sat on the end of their bed. Me and Mum got into the nitty gritty of the biblical side of things and by the end of our conversation came to a mutual understanding that we don’t agree with each other, but that’s fair enough.

So with my parents there is one outstanding issue, they keep on saying the word choice, when actually its not a choice at all. But I think that will just take time.



Saturday morning it was time for my brother. I sat him down and explained that I had a boyfriend and that I was gay. He just sat there and said “well its your choice” and then went to have a shower. I get the feeling he’s in denial about it.



Sunday night I phoned up my sister (she lives on the other end of the country). She was great, she basically didn’t care (not in a rude way, but it made no difference to her) and she wanted to add him on face book.

So that in a nutshell is my coming out to my family. I seriously cannot complain at God about how it went.