Monday’s ambush

Sorry for the lack of update, it’s been a little busy (as you can expect).
So after the weekend I got a call from mum and dad on Monday at work “we’re coming up to London for a chat”. :-S
Now just to give you a bit of context, it costs £50 return each ($100) to get to London and my parents are not made of money, so they obviously meant business. After feeling a little jittery all afternoon at work I left and caught the tube to Paddington and met them under the clock.

We left the station and headed towards the canal and a small café on the water front. We sat down and started to talk. We spoke about loads of stuff, they kept on asking questions and I kept on asking. We spoke about my suicidal moment I went through and everything, as I said, they asked the questions and I answered. They did keep on asking the question “are you sure?”.

Dad then asked me if I would be willing to give it 6months before coming out to make sure. I advised him that I had been through that already and that I wouldn’t have come out to my parents if I hadn’t.
They then said if I want to jack in my job and come home then I could. It was if they where trying to save me. Dad then said that you don’t need to deny your orientation, but you can chose not to act on it. When he said this the mist started to descend, I managed to keep a cool head “so dad are you asking me to be celibate for the rest of my life?”. With that came silence “I suppose I am”. Again staying calm “unfortunately dad I can’t do that, A: I don’t believe being an active homosexual is wrong and B: I need a relationship, I’m like a lost ship without one”.
In a firm way, but not rude, or unloving, or petulant way I said to them both “I think the understanding we need to come to is that we are coming from completely fundamental different places and therefore we will disagree”. They both agreed and repeated that they’ll love me what ever.
After that they gave me some name of some councillors that I could see, which to be fair is a good idea my is tres messed up at the best of times. (We’ll come back to those councillors later)
And with that we said goodbye and walked our separate ways.

I then headed to PingPong a Chinese restaurant with Stephe and got completely hammered of Sake.

The next morning I looked at the counselling services they had found, they where all “fix my gay son” services, I was a little offended to be honest. I know that all their doing is what they think is best for me and that its all done out of love but I still feels like their not accepting me. I think when it comes down to it, as manxxman said on my other post, I just need to give it a good lump of time.